Very happily she drops food for them on my window sill. Smilingly she puts a generous amount saying ‘The more we put the happier they are’. And then she drops them carefully by the corner because otherwise they’d fall down and the pigeons wouldn’t be able to have enough. ‘Heights of sincerity’ I think to myself about my mother.
She then closes the window to my surprise. If it were me, I’d keep my window open and sit back to watch them come and eat. I’d enjoy the sight. But she says, ‘They won’t come and feel free. They must enjoy themselves’, and quietly leaves my room. I stand there dazed. Watching through my window, shadows of pigeons fly and come towards it. One by one, a lot of them pecking food happily. And I wonder to myself, my mom doesn’t even know this? She finds happiness in feeding them and contentment in just knowing that they ate to their fill even without watching them. They don’t even know who does this for them. They don’t even know that the ease with which they eat had been prepared for and thought of already and is not a mere coincidence.
And then I remain there watching, and thinking to myself. How many a times her kindness towards me might have gone unnoticed? I recollect all those littlest of things I took for granted- waking up and seeing that the curtains are closed so the piercing sunlight may not disturb me, the blanket is over me so I’m not feeling too cold, the garbage basket is clear and emptied, breakfast is ready, my laptop is not next to me almost dropping off my bed but nicely placed over my table, my clothes are washed, etc. etc.
A drop of tear trickles down my eyes as I slowly realize all those people in my life whose kindness and love went unnoticed. To whom my ‘Sorry’s’ and ‘Thankyous’s’ were left unsaid.
I learn from my mom, by this little action she does. To try to excel in the smallest of deeds. And to be there for anyone when I can be there. And to thank wholeheartedly whenever I should. And to say sorry if it can mend a relationship. And to ‘not expect’ from anyone. And most importantly, I learn my lesson of ‘Sincerity’.
True sincerity is when you give someone and they don’t even know it. When you give so much that they can’t repay you. When you know that no one knows, but Allah SWT has seen you. Knowing that Him knowing is enough. Knowing that He won’t let it go forgotten. THAT’S sincerity.
Photo credit: Nasrul Arif at instagram.com/_nvszmhd/